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Silent Treatment: What to Do When Your Lover Goes Mute

There are those times when your better half decides to keep mum at home more so after a simple mis understanding. There are those kinds that always give their partners a silent treatment even on smallest issus that don’t need a vast expalanation. A silence treatment may be ignored at first but it has led to many young couples parting ways just beause of the ignorance on what should be done next.

In case she/ he decides to go mute, try out the following, they might help get him/ her back.


First of all, you have to relax. You should keep it mind that tough times and challenges will be always there as long as you are still living together. Don’t be irrational or frantic. Just keep on xercising patience.

Here, you have to look back at what could have sparked the silence. Is it something you said? Something you did or didn’t do or a misunderstanding?

Pray to God

If you are a beleiver, Let God/ Allah reveal to you how to go about it. Repent to God if you’ve done wrong. Pray that God makes your spouse’s heart moldable and receptive. You can even spiritual music in the house so that the presence of God feels the home. In the fullness of God there is fullness of joy.


If you realise that it was after a mistake that was done by you, you should aplogise. Some times even if what you said or did was right, you still want him/ her back, you should aplogise. What you said might have came out wrongly.

Remember that ove is not about proving who is wrong or right. What you need is for your spouse to warm up to you by you showing you are understanding. Say sorry as you give eye contact, if you are being avoided, write a text or a letter, reach out.

Note: But don’t over apologize, Just do one good sincere apology then give your spouse time for the apology to sink in. It is enough.

Listen to Music

Listen to the kind of music that you think can calm and warm up your heart. If it dancehall or reggae, play it loud.. If it is slow grooves or spiritual music, play it cool..

Keep Available

You can Present yourself to your spouse by just keeping around. Even if you two won’t talk, just be available. When you realise a simple change in her/ his minds, Start light conversations. But, don’t bring up the topic or tell your spouse to lighten up and stop acting cold. Attack will only make your spouse defensive.

Here, you can talk about how your day has been even if you get cold or brief feedback. She/ he may be silent but you talk just like you used to, amidst happiness and smiles. A warm demeanor is always attractive.

Do what she /he Likes

Cook your spouse’s favorite meal, buy her/ his best movie, Give warm eye contacts, dress sexy in bed.
Here, you can even do something different in the bedroom. Go all out in arousing and pleasing your spouse. Make love since intimacy breaks down walls.

When your spouse is now more intimate with you, talk about the matter in depth, each giving their opinion without being judged. Talk about the root cause, how it feels. Tell your spouse it is difficult to deal with matters when you give each other silent treatment, but still telling your spouse you understand why he/she went silent.

Wrap it up

Reaching here, it seems like he/ she can understand and ready to lit up the flames again. Apologize once again, forgive if wrong, agree on a way forward, how to deal with the issue in future.

You already got him/ back… You can Hug and kiss, cuddle, release. Say how much you need each other. Pray for your marriage together that God will keep molding you two. Cover your marriage with prayer.

Make love, go back to loving, laugh, talk about other positive stuff. Wake up in the morning smiling. Leave the matter in the past. It has been resolved. Move on.

What do you think?

Written by Kalema Lawrence

No one tells me what to write, so I will never tell you what to think.

Full-time entertainment blogger and seasoned Travel article writer. Reach me at +256 703 245760 and

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